Baldrick

Character

The character of Baldrick has become popularly associated with the comedic catch phrase "I have a cunning plan." The "cunning plans" in question are dreamed up by Baldrick as a solution to a particular problem or crisis and are usually ridiculed scathingly by Blackadder for their implausibility, but Blackadder frequently resorts to using these plans when the situation becomes desperate.

Although Baldrick's main goal is mostly very hidden, with a clever eye it is seen that he makes several attempts throughout history to raise his social standing, similar to Blackadder although the latter had much more success.

In the first series, Baldrick (a servant in the castle and a dung gatherer at the time) managed to gain favour with Lord Edmund Plantagenet by claiming he witnessed the King giving Edmund a special greeting (sarcastically). Edmund, impressed with Baldrick "admiring" him, appointed him his squire in the Battle of Bosworth Field. Later, when Richard III was killed (by Edmund), Baldrick helped him cover it up and managed to remain in Edmund's service after he became a prince. Throughout the first series, Baldrick always assists Edmund and keeps him in the illusion that he is admired until the last episode where Baldrick gets fired and, due to having worked for years to even get into the castle, goes to very low jobs. After Edmund left, he cried (either for losing his status or for actual attachment to the Prince). Baldrick managed to do one last thing for the Prince and, with Lord Percy Percy's assistance, killed the Black Seal (the six most evil men in England plus Blackadder's archenemy). Percy accidentally also poisoned the royal family and Edmund. It is unknown what happened to him.

In the second series, Baldrick's attempts to raise his social status bring much lower results due to his much smaller intelligence. His most visible attempt is in the first episode, where he tries to marry Lord Edmund Blackadder as his bridesmaid (after Kate eloped). Baldrick still has enough intelligence left to admire Blackadder and clearly has a desire to please him. Nevertheless, Edmund despises Baldrick and even fires him once. This great obstacle was removed for a short period of time when Edmund was kidnapped by Prince Ludwig the Indestructible along with Lord Melchett, so that Baldrick was able to get into the royal court by becoming the Queen's personal pet. A few hours later, he was murdered by Prince Ludwig along with Blackadder, Melchett, Queenie, Nursie, and Lord Percy.

Character development

Pilot episode

In 1982, prior to the first Black Adder series, a pilot episode was filmed which featured a number of characters who were later included in the first series. The episode, which was not televised until 2023, included an early version of the Baldrick character, played by Philip Fox, who is portrayed as slightly stupid in contrast to the intelligent, scheming Prince Edmund. Following this pilot, the writers decided to reverse this relationship when the first televised series was produced, so that Baldrick was the clever foil to the idiotic Edmund. In 2010, The Guardian reflected on this change in characterisation, suggesting that it had been a poor decision and commenting that it was "an interesting example of getting it right first time":

The Black Adder

The medieval Baldrick was probably the only Baldrick of the four who could really be described as clever. Baldrick, an ex-dung shoveller (a respected position, which he had worked very hard to get – earlier jobs include milking pigs and mucking out lepers) and Son of Robin the Dung Gatherer, first met Prince Edmund at the feast before the Battle of Bosworth Field and using flattery became his Squire. The two, along with Lord Percy, toasted their new friendship, unaware that from that point onwards, their descendants' lives would be eternally entwined.

Although cleverer than the Prince, Baldrick, knowing his place in the medieval pecking-order, holds him in awe. He often leads cheers in the Prince's honour (along with Lord Percy, who tries hard to join in), fills his head with illusions of grandeur, and often ends up doing his dirty work. This included carrying the decapitated body of Richard III and sleeping with the Spanish Infanta, Edmund's fiancée, making her unchaste in hopes that this would prevent the marriage. The latter task resulted in several injuries, including a seriously blackened eye. When Baldrick is abandoned by Edmund in the final episode, a tear falls from his eye.

This Baldrick also has cunning plans that, contrary to most of those of his descendants, mostly work. For instance, when Edmund seeks to kill Dougal McAngus, Baldrick suggests that he gets a cannon, takes McAngus outside, makes him stick his head down the cannon and then blow it off. Edmund scoffs at this, and instead tries to kill McAngus using several different "cunning plans" of his own. After having failed miserably with all of these, he resorts to using Baldrick's original plan, which works.

It is Baldrick who suggests the title "The Black Adder" for Prince Edmund, which his descendants later adopt as a surname.

This Baldrick survived the last episode as he and Lord Percy had poisoned the wine to stop the Black Seal. But Percy poisoned the whole batch, killing the king, the queen, Prince Harry, the entire court and Edmund. He and Percy tried to stop them but they were too late, running in after the credits when everybody was already dead.

The "clever" Baldrick character was abandoned after the first series, becoming steadily more foolish with each incarnation.

Blackadder II

The Elizabethan Baldrick is the servant and bondsman to Lord Blackadder. He has been in Blackadder's family since 1532, when he was two years old. He has a bedroom in Blackadder's house, but has also been forced to sleep in the gutter and on the roof. He has a tendency to eat dung. While his master treats him with utter contempt, he remains intensely loyal.

This Baldrick is considerably less intelligent than his medieval ancestor, although not as dim as future Baldricks. A kindly soul, Baldrick's lack of formal education is compensated for by his basic streetwise cunning. While his "cunning plans" do sometimes have a strange, twisted and often perverse logic and cunning to them, he is nevertheless incredibly stupid. For example, in the episode "Head", Blackadder attempts to teach Baldrick how to add, asking if he had "two beans, and I add two more beans, what does that make?" Baldrick replies, "Some beans", "Three beans... and that one", and "a very small casserole".

Baldrick loves turnips, a trait that would also be present in his descendants. In the episode "Beer", where he and Percy famously discover a turnip shaped like a "thingy". Baldrick is particularly delighted by the discovery, because it contrasts with his own "thingy" which is shaped like a turnip. In the same episode Baldrick reveals his recipe for "Turnip Surprise" – "the surprise is: there's nothing in it except the turnip".

Blackadder: The Cavalier Years

Baldrick (possibly died 1649) is servant to Sir Edmund Blackadder. Like his Elizabethan ancestor, he moonlights as an executioner, although in his case it is part of a cunning plan to save the life of Charles I of England by replacing his head with a pumpkin. His plan fails. When Blackadder is about to be captured he quickly disguises himself as a Roundhead and leaves Baldrick to be killed instead. He is the son of a pig farmer and a bearded lady.

Blackadder the Third

The Baldrick of Regency Britain works as an "underscrogsman" (apprentice dogsbody) to Mr. E. Blackadder Esq., butler to Prince George. He lives in a pipe in the upstairs water closet of the Palace.

The third Baldrick is much more noticeably crude and unintelligent than those previous to him and maybe even the stupidest of all four Baldricks. Like his Elizabethan ancestor, he is known to eat dung occasionally. He is also more childlike; when asked if he has any distinguishing features, referring to his nose he asserts, "I've got this huge growth in the middle of my face." There is not the slightest sign of "cunning" in any of his plans, which include:

escaping the guillotine by waiting until your head has been cut off, then "springing into action" and running "around and around the farmyard, and out the farmyard gate", in the style of a chicken, and

replacing the burnt first copy of Samuel Johnson's dictionary by taking the string, which has been salvaged, and putting in some new pages. Blackadder clarifies that Baldrick is suggesting that he re-write the entire dictionary in a single night. Blackadder, purely out of desperation, attempts this anyway, before getting stuck at "Aardvark".

Blackadder also claims that Baldrick has never changed his trousers, and implores him never to do so, for they are, Blackadder claims, akin to Pandora's Box, containing all the evils of the world.

Although he is now on a closer social standing to Blackadder than before, he still receives the same (and possibly more) level of abuse as his Elizabethan ancestor. Blackadder punches him; kicks him; breaks a milk-jug over his head; smashes a huge turnip on his head; roasts him for a few minutes on a spit; grabs him by the shirt collar; threatens to cut him up into strips and tell the prince that he "walked over a very sharp cattle grid in an extremely heavy hat"; and promises five minutes of hellish tortures involving a small pencil, surpassing anything possible from Beelzebub over all eternity. However, he does seem to have a higher level of friendship with Blackadder than the other series.

However, despite his noticeable flaws, this Baldrick has more success than any of the others. In an election rigged by Blackadder, he is elected Member of Parliament for Dunny-on-the-Wold, a rotten borough, although he was intended to be a puppet for Blackadder to manipulate (Blackadder's political opponents succeed in manipulating him instead). He is later made a Lord by Prince George, and is therefore eligible to sit in the House of Lords – whether or not he ever does so is another matter, as he is never again referred to by his title after episode 1. Baldrick also succeeds where no Baldrick has succeeded before or since, in calling Blackadder "a lazy, big-nosed, rubber-faced bastard".

Blackadder's Christmas Carol

Mr. Baldrick is assistant in Ebenezer Blackadder's moustache shop. While still stupid, it seems that having to work for the exceedingly gullible Mr Blackadder has forced him to develop some of the savvy of his earlier ancestors. Unlike his previous (and later) ancestors, he has a simile of his own to match Blackadder's: "I just wish we weren't doing so well in the 'bit-short-of-pressies-and-feeling-a-gullible-prat' ledger." He remains the only person to be fooled by Tiny Tom Scratchit's alleged lameness, however. He is also possibly the only person ever to spell "Christmas" without getting any of the letters right (he apparently renders the word as "Kwelfnuve" then "corrects" it to "Kweznuz").

Blackadder Goes Forth

Private S. Baldrick (presumed dead 1917) is a private in a First World War trench, serving under Captain Blackadder and Lieutenant George. His hero is Lord Flashheart.

The fourth Baldrick comes from the lowest level of British Edwardian society. Before the war he was scraping a living at the "Turnip Street Workhouse". Upon the outbreak of hostilities the workhouse formed its own pals battalion which Baldrick signed up to join. In the final episode he says that all his friends have died, suggesting that he is the last surviving member of the Turnip Street Workhouse Pals.

Equal in foulness to the third Baldrick, Private Baldrick also matches his immediate predecessor in terms of stupidity. His "cunning plans", like those of his Elizabethan ancestor, have an insane, perverse logic to them. Examples include carving his name on a bullet, in relation to the old saying "a bullet with your name on it", his explanation being that if he owns the bullet, it could not ever kill him as he would not ever shoot himself ("shame", comments Captain Blackadder), and the chances of there being two bullets with "Baldrick" on them are "very small indeed". He has also been known to eat cigarettes as seen in the last episode of the series.

He also is the only Baldrick to confront Blackadder after being hit; he does so on one occasion, and is very conscious of class divisions. While this briefly attracts him to the ideals of Bolshevism, he is just as willing to marry General Melchett if it allows him to escape his lower-class status. His family seem to worship Lord Flashheart, declaring that they all took up smoking to collect cigarette cards bearing his image and that his grandmother smoked herself to death so they could afford the album.

In the first episode, Captain Cook, he claims to be the first Baldrick in the entire family tree to have a brilliant plan (becoming cooks for HQ to escape the trenches), giving a speech saying, "Permission to write home immediately sir! This is the first brilliant plan a Baldrick's ever had. For centuries we've tried, and they've always turned out total pig swill! My mum will be pleased as punch." This mood was however, slightly dampened when Blackadder pointed out the minor flaw: Baldrick is "the worst cook in the entire world". He also hates hospitals because his grandfather went into one and when he came out, he was dead. Blackadder then points out that he was also dead when he went in, because he'd been run over by a traction engine.

Blackadder: Back & Forth

Baldrick is a septic tank cleaner to the 20th century Lord Blackadder in Blackadder: Back and Forth. His first appearance is serving Blackadder's millennium dinner, which he does wearing nothing but an amusing apron, on a whim. His cooking is similar to Private Baldrick's; he prepared dinner by coughing over an avocado. His underpants may date from the 18th century, or in any case smell as though they do, and turn out to be the cause of the extinction of the dinosaurs. Rather surprisingly he builds a working time machine, making him "the greatest genius who ever lived". Or it would do, if he knew how it worked and had not just built it using a combination of the plans of Leonardo da Vinci and an apparent skill at building Airfix models being able to make up for his inability to read the plans. Following his master's rewriting of history, he becomes Prime Minister of the United Kingdom – and possibly dictator, as the television commentator observes that elections have been abolished (although how much power he has with Edmund as king is questionable). His intelligence appears to be between that of the medieval Baldrick and the Elizabethan Baldrick. His "cunning plan" was possibly the only plan which a Blackadder ever thought was a good plan, albeit with a slight modification to it.

Also, Legionary Baldricus is a soldier under Centurion Blaccadicus in the Roman Britain section of Blackadder: Back & Forth as part of the forces defending Hadrian's Wall. He is apparently bilingual (although it is possible he is a local conscript and does not really understand Latin). He wears his helmet back to front, and was presumably killed by the attacking "Scots".

Other Baldricks

Bert Baldrick, dogsbody to Thomas Gainsborough's butler, is mentioned by the third Baldrick as his cousin, who says that Bert says that "all portraits look the same because they're painted to a romantic ideal rather than the idiosyncratic facial features of the person in question." Bert Baldrick, Blackadder observes, must have a far larger vocabulary than Sodoff Baldrick.

Baldrick, slave to Grand Admiral Blackadder of the Dark Segment in the future section of Blackadder's Christmas Carol. He doesn't actually get to do much except stand around in a posing pouch. In an alternate future in which he is the Grand Admiral, he manages to destroy his own forces.

One of the eight Ravens at the Tower of London is named Baldrick, presumably in response to the Blackadder series.

The Comic Relief publication of the complete Blackadder scripts (Blackadder: The Whole Damn Dynasty 1485–1917) contains "Baldrick's Family tree", which mainly comprises all the children of a Baldrick being called Baldrick. Occasionally there are some exceptions. Some of the other entries in Baldrick's family tree include the common cold, dung beetles, ticks, Earls Court (change for Ealing), Ruislip, Pot plant, Paul Gascoigne, Ronald Reagan and his children Ronnie and Thingie. A Neolithic ancestor by the name of Bad Reek is mentioned as being present at the construction of Stonehenge. The sixth wife of Henry VIII is also claimed to be a Baldrick, on account of the king being "old, half-mad and suffering from syphilis at the time, [and so] was happy to get anything he could".

Uncle Baldrick, who is never seen but who Baldrick says was an actor who played Macbeth's second codpiece ("Macbeth wore him in the fight scenes"..."Ah, so he was a stunt codpiece".). When asked if his uncle had "a large part" he replied that it depended on which actor played Macbeth.

Private S. Baldrick's father, who is never seen but who Baldrick says was a nun (when the judge asked him his profession, he said "None"). His mother is frequently mentioned, and Blackadder says that she is a resident of London Zoo, has a complexion which is worse than Punch, from Punch and Judy, the famous puppet show, and Baldrick is her only human child. His grandfather died from being run over by a traction engine. His grandmother "smoked herself to death" so that Baldrick's family could afford the album of Lord Flasheart's cigarette cards.

Dynasty

Bad Reek, Head Laborer of Stonehenge - Neolithic Britain

Legionary Baldricus – Roman Britain

Robin Baldrick the Dung Gatherer - Middle Ages Baldrick's father

Baldrick, Bachelor of the Parish of Chigwell – Middle Ages

Baldrick – Elizabethan

Baldrick – English Civil War

Sodoff, Lord Baldrick – Regency

Bert Baldrick – Regency Baldrick's cousin

Mr. Baldrick – 1858

Private S. Baldrick – World War I

The Rt Hon. S. Baldrick MP, Prime Minister, septic tank cleaner